“Good, Great, Grand, Wonderful. No Yelling On The Bus!”

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by @DimTillard


  • Traveling from city to city is a huge part of the professional baseball life.  In the Big Leagues there are charter flights and short bus rides to the field or team hotel.
  • Some Triple-A teams fly commercial. (on Southwest flights, to avoid someone sitting directly beside you, it is important to look deranged & unapproachable)
  • Minor League Baseball is mostly bus friendly.  Whether it’s a 45 minute commute or 12 hours across four states, the wheels on the bus go round.  And every trip is a journey of it’s own.

A suitcase with clothes, shoes, and toiletries is important.  But the most vital thing is the baseball bag.  If a player forgets his suitcase, it’s a temporary inconvenience.  If a player forgets his baseball bag or an essential baseball item, it’s the definition of panic and nausea. (double-check everything… twice)

Bus riders must not expect a pit stop on the excursion.  Once a traveler boards, it could be non-stop from A to B.  Passengers are encouraged to bring necessity items: bottled water, snacks, iPhone (phone, internet, music, map, compass, alarm clock, flashlight, calendar, camera, calculator), headphones, beef jerky, etc.

First seat on the bus is the managers.  Then pitching coach, hitting coach, trainer, strength trainer, and radio broadcaster.  Traditionally, the first 8 rows are on the quieter side, and the last 8 are louder.  The middle is made up of card games. (pizza boxes suffice for a makeshift card table)

Rookies double up.  If there are not enough rows for people to have their own two seats, rookies sit together.  This gives the veteran players more leg room and comfort.  Not because they’ve earned it, but because of their bad backs and hip problems.

Regardless of outside temperature, every bus will be between 33 and 35 degrees Fahrenheit.  Not entirely sure why, but it’s better than sweating your baseballs off. (hoodies can be used for warmth as well as a pillow) (pillows can also be used as pillows)

When choosing a movie for the bus’s DVD player, it’s best to look for certain criteria.

  1. No animated movies.
  2. Volume must be kept extremely low, or incredibly loud.
  3. Must be rated PG-13 or R.
  4. If it’s a baseball movie it CANNOT be Summer Catch.
  5. It’s best to have at least one of these actors in the movie: Will Ferrell, Russell Crowe, Jim Carrey, Slynold Stallozenegger, or Adam Sandler (anything before Spanglish)

(*no movies or loud phone calls till after 12:00pm local time)

“Yes”, the bus has a restroom.  “No”, you’re NOT allowed to go #2.  Only numero uno.  And since precision on a moving bus is challenging, shoes are strongly encouraged in the lavatory. (socks or bare feet at your own risk)

Travel days can be long and sometimes grueling.  However, they can be salvaged, by one small coveted phrase, “Show & Go”.


 “Smells like a dead raccoon filled with ricotta cheese!”

*4 of 16*

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7 thoughts on ““Good, Great, Grand, Wonderful. No Yelling On The Bus!”

  1. Ok, I’m stumped and I feel like the ‘dumb girl’ here. I have been around baseball my whole life, not just playing(until whatever age it was that I was ‘forced’ to play softball), but I was immersed in the MLB culture with my father as well. All that being said, and after a quick Google search w/ no results, what is the definition of “Show & Go”? I have an idea but for the sake of not looking like a total knucklehead, could you please tell me?

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    • Show & go is slang for arriving and playing the ballgame. No team stretch, no groundballs, no batting practice. Gives 3 extra relaxing hours before a game.

      Like

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